Who Chooses to Mediate Their Divorce?/Martin Rosenfeld

Posted on March 6, 2011


What can be said about people who choose to mediate their divorce? I have seen no studies on this topic, but I will offer 5 hypotheses:

1. People who choose to mediate rather than litigate their divorce are concerned about the mental health and well-being of their children.  They know that prolonged litigation will likely scar their children and will alienate the children from one or possibly both of their children.

2. People who mediate are not convinced that getting the “best deal” is all that is involved in divorce negotiations.  Rather they worry about how they conduct themselves during a stressful period and seek to leave their marriage with their dignity and self-respect intact.

3. People who mediate value the opportunity to have a series of civil and meaningful discussions with their ex-spouses before they begin the next chapter in their life.

4. People who mediate are not fearful of dialogue and do not feel a compelling need to have a legal representative speak for them about issues that matters and feelings that deserve attention and eventual closure.

5. People who mediate know the importance of getting to win-Win and will not miss out on such an opportunity by replacing dialogue with needless, and costly, litigation.

There is much to be said for divorce mediation. You can plan for a new future or enrich your favorite legal advocate. The choice is one only you can make, Choose wisely.